Oh, I’m tired. I go
over the readings, videos and posts this week and I feel tired. And I feel so sad. And if I don’t perk up I might get
philosophical too.
A ‘Facebook friend’ of mine once posted something along the
lines of:
‘Why on earth would a
mum send their child to a kindergarten Christmas party with a box of Cheezels?My kids like healthy food. ‘
I got a bit worked up, and, with visions of her children at
the last party with fistfuls of Cheezels in their hot little hands and sharing
them with no one, I immediately composed a reply:
Five Reasons why a mum
would send her child to a kindergarten party with Cheezels
1. Cheezels are delicious
2. It is a party
3. It is Christmas
4. The dad probably bought them
5. There is no way that mum is going to try to
compete with the mums who bring natural muesli cookies or homemade cupcakes individually
decorated like Sesame Street characters
I never posted it. I
told myself it was not worth a fight and my response was unnecessarily passive
aggressive. I was being a bully. She had her opinions and I had mine, and we
actually shared others. I simply exercised
my ability to self-edit maturely and thoughtfully.
I was bullied sometimes when I was young. And it hurt.
And I got over it. And I don’t
really think of the people who did it. I also acknowledge that, sadly, some people
never get over it and I cannot pretend to understand how it can affect other
people or their families. Thinking of my
bullies now, what they could have done with the anonymity and freedom of new social media makes my skin
crawl. I would hope that with age,
generally, people realise when they are horrible - and perhaps why – and start
to modify their behaviour. However,
social media is a pretty easy place to hide and be mean… Here is a quickand easy-to-find example that took me no time to find.
People like Rheingold dream of a utopian online society,
where communities form to the benefit of real-life communities; sharing ideas,
making plans, figuring out issues and developing new relationships. Rheingold does acknowledge though that ‘the
fundamentals of Human Nature always scale up.’
This here is my problem – that damn human nature getting in the way –
the need for power, the ability to hurt someone for your own purpose, your own
survival instinct kicking in. These
always show up alongside the best parts of human nature – even online! Many people come to recognise them and manage
them better as they get older.
Unfortunately, I do not know how to predict the behaviour of
younger people, who’s technology is a vital part of their being (Turkle, 2011),
in their online communities. I do not
know how to protect them from the things they might do or experience. I just want them to be resilient. As I stand over
the stovetop, making my still-small children a lentil curry with organic
spinach and brown rice (yeah right), I also start devising strategies to make
my children resilient, as well as decent members of society and the human race,
as they face a digital-rich future. All good!
Turkle, Sherry 2011, Alone Together : Why We Expect More
from Technology and Less from Each Other, e-book, accessed 3 February 2013,
http://swin.eblib.com.au.ezproxy.lib.swin.edu.au/patron/FullRecord.aspx?p=684281.
Lisa, I enjoyed readying your post. I think of the many times I have held back from saying something in response to someone's comments. it's hard to keep those fingers in check sometimes - they just want to type out a response. I found your blog to be quite humorous with reference to the cheezels.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately though its not just the youth of today who use the abundance of technology as a platform o bullying. there are way to many adults out there who should know better. the impacts of their actions can be devastating to their victims and permanent
Hi Liz, thanks for your comment. I definitely didn't want to seem obtuse with my cheezels example - for me, it demonstrated how easily one can get into something bully-like online. I know that you have had a terrifying experience with a cyber-stalker and again, I cannot begin to understand how this can effect your life (Your post is a good help though), and you are right, adults do stupid, mean things online now, that they might not normally do because of the perception of anonymity and safety in numbers.
ReplyDeleteDecent members of society and the human race- that's what it comes down to Lisa! Being kind, smart and trying not to get involved with others who aren't acting like 'decent members'.
ReplyDeleteA great post- I was captivated the whole way through!
Good luck with organic lentil curry- I'm eating frozen chips for dinner!! :)
Glad I'm not the only one who doesn't have time for homemade muesli bars!
ReplyDeleteThe dark side of social media makes my skin crawl too, and I worry how my children will navigate their way through this new world when they get older. Thankfully the government seems to be trying to tackle this issue with an educational module called bCyberwise. Hopefully the better informed our young people are, the more they will think about the ramifications of what they do and say online and what effect it might have on the lives of others.